On The Last Day Valentine

Our words are winter birds

That sleep in snowy trees

And burst in little flames

Thrown up against the sky

When I look up I see a comet

Carrying 150 people impossibly

Through pink morning light

The past century flashing by

I imagine them the last survivors

Fleeing the burning world

Or maybe another Noah's load

Of strange new animals and plants

Immigrants from the sun awaiting

A dove to bring them word

Coming After Valentine

Five days old at eight o'clock

The sun is split by the corner column

Like two arms reaching out around it

To hold a little darkness at the center

Where I am sitting in an old

Dilapidated barn bird thoughts

Fluttering in the rafters

Small dusty dreams thrown off

By their soft mutterings

Wondering where they've gone

Leaving only an impression in the straw

Where they curled together to keep warm

And a urgency in the brightening air

Three vaporous kings to follow

Mid-Life Earth Valentine

If the lakes are the eyes of the earth

And the oceans its churning belly

And the land masses and mountains

It sturdy shoulders and limbs

Where will we find its seething heart

If not at its fiery core its veins

Of lava from the sun at its center

Its roaming plants and animals the first

Manifestations of its soul unfolding itself

Which leaves us humans

To become its breathing thoughts

We dreamers of this earth

Still young enough to keep it

And too old to throw it away

A Christmas Night's Dream Valentine

Here we are when the curtain rises

Sitting on the couch watching Tik-Tok

A cute four year old Irish boy

Proposing to his mother

Promising never to live without her

Am I not your eternal child

To which she consents smiling

Then we're driving somewhere

How can you know all the songs

But I keep silent smiling as we pass

A little girl immaculately dressed

Who gives us the finger

And we gasp together how

Can this be Christmas Adam

Still Valentine

Each day a year encloses

Every morning brings a spring

A summer fills an afternoon

Until the twilight falls

And leaves turn into the snow

Of dreams drifting down

From nights of centuries

Covering our little cabin

Near to heaven in the woods

And I'm still breaking the ice

In the pail years later to wash

My old face in the fiery water 

Still kneeling to nurse a few flames

To light this brand new day

And wake my sleeping lover

Solstice Valentine

I know what it means to me

But not what I mean to it

The weight of the sun in my lap

This cold winter's day

Singeing me on one side

While frost creeps up behind

Urging me to turn like it

Done with our undoing

And go back the other way

But what if it kept going

Deeper and deeper into the dark

As left to itself it might

If not at the final minute dawned

Some stronger spirit's light

Why Birds Valentine

Some are given only a call

While others are given a song

Some are not fortunate at all

But must fight to carry on

While others skate and thrive

Circling a sunny sky

Some share a single soul

While others go without

Some bright and colorful

Others shiny black or brown

But all of this is just a play

The vagaries of variety

What matters most to me

Is they all of know how to fly

Finding It Valentine

What if you had a star

Walk into your life don't balk

I mean the being of a star

Preposterous but bear with me

Don't let even the thought of it

Crumble into fantasy

But putting everything else aside

Step into a shaft of total darkness

As you wait for it to arrive

Someone who has always known you

Someone you have longed to know

Of course you can barely believe it

And yes it was always there

The life within your life within your life

After Words Valentine

They say as soon as he was born

He spoke in a lilting voice

In secret only to his mother

A whole new language

He was composing as they

Rode through the dusty streets

She held him tight to her heart

Straining to hear his little words

Above the roar of the world

That came down hard upon them

With a night so heavy with stars

That echoed his words of light

They had to stop and stare

Alone in the silence there

If You Want To Know Valentine

If you want to know at any time

What's going on in the world

Listen for what no one's saying

Just buried under their words

About equality and human rights

Which can never come to be

Without the essential foundation

Of a real fraternity of all

For each and each for all

This one thing the world's wealthy

Always most strenuously avoid

The idea of a shared humanity

You no more in need than me

Each in each other's care

Once A Year Valentine

In the curious fable of the palm trees

Who all longed to be ballet dancers

With their long legs and swirling skirts

Arranged in lines along the beach

There came a windy choreographer

Who sketched a pattern in the sand

Once a year on Christmas day

It was where a baby lay

Cast up by the churning waves

A magic child who granted wishes

When the palms began to sway

And to their dancing added voices

That rose in praise from far away

Once a year on Christmas day

Just Take The Sun Valentine

What began in the will

Must end up in the will

After long traveling

Through my feelings

Just take the sun

First it was there

And then I appeared

Waving and wailing

Only much later

Did I start thinking

Of how all this

Leads me to you

That I am what I do

Not what I felt or was thinking

Promised Valentine

It seems the sun and I

Have placed the world

Between us as the visible sign

Of a certain understanding

We have reached together

Each year at this time

To adopt a newborn child

And then abandon him

To his mother and the cold

But the sun has promised

To show him how to shine

All the way into the earth

To suffer me to make him mine

And share with him a lasting birth

Borderline Valentine

We live in a new moon time

When the light lays itself on the line

Betting it all against the darkness

Let it be extinction or we say

Illumination if we must chose

To find out what we're made of

Let's finally call for the question

To argue ourselves out of existence

Or give ourselves more life

More and more life for everyone

On the razor's edge of the moon

We children of darkness and light

Taking from each what we need

And stop threatening ourselves with doom

In The Sign Of The Brothers Valentine

Only at this late date am I

Learning about the annual

Shower of stars that falls

Twelve days before Christmas

Seven days before the solstice

Only at this late date

Do I get to wonder about

What adjustments this creates

In the way we breath and move

Subtle shifts in our moods

From something stirring inside

As we come to the darkest day

When the sun stops itself to let

A greater light pass by

Willing Valentine

If truth takes up

All the permanent space

The ephemeral is all

That beauty's left to be

To stand without defenses

And be willing to fade away

But not without a fatal blow 

To what we call our senses

Which beauty itself installs

In our otherwise useless flesh

That we might helplessly receive it

Coming and going on the earth

Bit by bit opening us up

To more and more truth

November Valentine

Against the peeling wall

A single purple flower

With its few leaves and poise

Despite it is November

And the last dregs of the sun

No longer reach its corner

But still it wants its beauty

To be be numbered among all

The other beauties of the world

To suddenly be heard

Crying out in its final hour

I am what you could be

There is no eternity

Just purple purple purple

Play Within A Play Valentine

If the archetypes are always there

Hovering lambent in the air

Then by the logic of the stars

Our task becomes to let them shine

In us their greater lives

Take up our parts and places

In their fairy-tales and legends

Their deeper battles fought for us

Cold light against warm darkness

They too dance to a still higher

Imagination a music

Of whims and wishes

Dying for transformation

Playthings of the sun

'Tis The Season Valentine

Whoever stole the snowman

From our porch last night

Please come back and take 

The baby Jesus you obviously 

Need him more than we do

But I hope you know the star

That followed him now follows you

Please leave Mary and the donkey

So she'll get used to missing him

On the long trip back from Egypt

You must have children too

You want to cherish and amaze

But no gifts to bring no kings

These humbug Christmas days

Pursuing An Apercu Valentine

When I was nine a dog attacked me

Walking home from school through

Empty alleys to avoid the streets

Dreaming of who I could become

It sprang at me ferociously

Behind its wire fence

And angry at the fear I felt

I went right up to it

And started barking back

Which was when it leapt

And bit the corner of my mouth

Which is how I got this scar

Whether bravery or foolish pride

It was what woke me up inside

The blood was on my lips

And I knew that I could die

Which never occurred to me before

Her Name Valentine

I'm robbing Paul to pay Paul

Peter's pockets are full of holes

I'm stealing death to pay death

I can barely afford a soul

I call her Sophie darling

My dying little girl

And though she's lived

For a thousand years

She's just learned

To write her name

Next year she'll go to school

I'm working three jobs

To pay for it all

If she's not too ill

Past Time Valentine

In the many years you've known me

Have I changed and how and why

Have I plumbed the limitations

Of my capacity for love and fear

Or merely deepened my delusions

About what love can be

Did I love you for myself alone

Just so you would love me back

And when you did and didn't

Did I grow an inch or two

In letting myself go

Out beyond what love could be

To a taste for joy I've come to know

That has forever altered me

Alone Valentine

I can see its shadow tangled now

In the starfish cactus and tell

It's a dove wobbling on the roof

I can remember summer

When it had a mate and they

Would come together every day

And sit on the gate and wait

Till the coast was clear

To fly to the bowl and drink

First one and then the other

Sipping the precious water

Why do they separate

For love's long winter

When you'd think

They'd need each other most

All their children lost

And me alone to wonder

Christmas Lights Valentine

One of our neighbors down the street

Hired a crane to cover

His enormous ficus tree

With colored lights last week

It looked like a giant wig

Wearing a crown of sparkling gems

But as if that wasn't enough

He lit up the yard and entire house

Until it resembled that candied hut

Hansel and Gretel would soon arrive

To nibble on and wake the witch

And instead of shepherds and kings

He planted a skeleton tall as the roof

Whose eyes are glowing coals

Its hand lunging for a falling star

I Still See Your Face Valentine

The big blue urn is full of rain

From last night's crashing storm

The water's surface trembling in the sun

Throwing its reflection on the wall

A lively chaos of light and shade

Like the insides of a seed

Or the becoming of a soul

About to fall to the earth

When now and then the water stills

And sunlight plunges in

Igniting a fiery gleaming

In its gloomy depths

Who knew the big blue urn

Was such an alchemist

To Be Sung Valentine

After the rain when the sun comes out

The sweet syncopation of the rooftop-drops

And the gurgles in the alley

And the plops in the pail

And the garden shining

Like it wants to wail

And we sense some rainbow's

Not far behind when the firs

Stand erect and salute the sky

And the wind does wheelies

Round the plumped-up clouds

And it's all such a heart-rending

Quickly-passing parade

When the sylphs go dancing

And the undines rave

A Day For The Books Valentine

Do we really need this many books

You smiled with a box in your hands

Let's cull the ones we've read

And don't really need to keep

Even if only for room for more

And it was interesting to see

Which ones we couldn't part with

Just to have them in our possession

Or to be in their presence is it

But we managed to fill a satchel

To re-sell at the old bookstore

For which we received a measly

Thirty pieces of silver just

Enough for a Mexican lunch

And two new books we found

Starving but so delicious

Unsolved Mysteries of the Neighborhood Valentine

Do you know who tied red roses

To all the posts and fences

Along Hermosa Street and why

Do you know what dark angel

Stole poor Hector's ten-speed bike

Now he'll have to walk to work

What could have caused

Those two great booms last night

No one seems to have heard

And that screaming sobbing woman

Four doors down I couldn't make out

What she was trying to tell the cops

Who finally took her away

And Flora's cat named Sunshine

Gone where for the hundredth day

I Am Valentine

I am to the world

As this tiny ant is to me
Together alone we're crossing

This vast plaza by the sea

Stopping here and there

To turn in circles wait

Searching always searching

Sniffing the warming air

For our lost colony

And if I were to follow you

Will you lead me to your caves

Deeper than memory

And if you were to follow me

Will I give your back the world

For an ounce of your bravery

Trial By Fire Valentine

When her blood pressure soared

And the doctors could find the source

The hospital so crowded they put 

Her in a bed in a busy corridor

where she lay for a day and night

Unable to speak or lift her head

To eat first feverish then freezing

Until they finally found her a bed

In a room so small and cramped

You couldn't fit a chair in it

Next to a demented woman

Who screamed constantly for help

For four days all she could do

Was try to remember everyone

Who had ever loved her or she

Had ever loved and somehow there

Hovering between life and death

Between the light and darkness

Pouring through the one window

She found her way back home

To this heaven we call earth

Same Old Valentine

Of course it's the same old story

Freshly disguised every century

Of that poor brilliant scholar Lucifer

If you don't love me I will kill you

And fuck you in your grave

Of course he's in love with power

And envies the bodily beauty

Of those two naked ones over there

Representative of all slow learners

But doesn't the fact that it must

Be repeated over and over again

Imply a new unwritten ending

Not even the author can supply

Garden Scene Valentine

And then there's this

Thirteenth sense that comes

After the other twelve

Have been dissolved

Crouched over a stone

In agony seeing what

Must be said and done

And cannot be avoided

But it was still spring

And you know how spring is

The first flowers unstoppable

In their willingness to be born

So-Called Valentine

Even on cold gray mornings like these

The dead who have been busy

In our dreams all night

Slip out into the meager light

Resuming their work and restless play

In wings and leaves and rocks

In the very colors of things

But mostly in the eager wind

Where they push through tirelessly

Mining our minds more coal than gold

Unrecognized appearances

They make piercing the invisible

Darkness where we survive

On the starlight of their love

If At All Valentine

I think the true history of human beings

Can only be found in small circles of friends

Who weave together their dreams

In pictures and music and talk

Women and men crouched together

Around a shared sense of their 

Particular moment in time

Who reach out to warm their hands

Around the central fire of life

They can see it burning there

An incision in the surrounding dark

While the rest of us unconscious

As children only catch up

Centuries later if at all

These Last Days Valentine

There must be birds here living still

But strangely I haven't seen

A single one in the three days

I've been wandering these woods

Of a hundred species of trees

Just the croaking of crows

Who come to harvest the nuts

For a few days in October

And then gone as suddenly

As they appeared leaving behind

A silence that's shining in the fields

And even the full bird-feeders

By the house haven't lost

A single seed the beautiful trees

Just stand there purposeless and dumb

Not a bird left in the world

A Meeting Valentine

I sat in a wide circle

Of eighteen great souls

Artists scientists explorers thinkers

Who wanted to see what is really there

And in my imagination

Went around and stood

In front of each one and said

I would like to be you

If you would let me

I would like to share

Your deepest longings

And the things that trouble you

Because I feel certain

Somewhere in all of you

I will find my lost self

But in the morning I woke

With a dream of several deer

Emerging from the edge of a woods

Who seeing me rather

Than running off lay down

Peacefully in the tall grass

And invited me to join them

Baptismal Valentine

You are a deed of the gods

A word in their language

Summoned to mind

When they speak to one another

You have been given your own darkness

And your own star to extinguish it

Longing calling to longing

Light to light

In you the gods create themselves

Their deeds your body

Their words your soul

On loan till you create your own

Our Mother Valentine

Give us this day our daily lies

That we may discern the truth

Forgive us those

We have not forgiven

That we may forgive ourselves

Tempt us into your kindness

Give us the strength to behold

The ravenous beasts we are

To threaten them with mercy

To scold them with compassion

Remind us of your victory to come

When all is said and done

That we be present when your love

Lifts us from our oblivion

Perfect Valentine

I think secretly everyone knows

The goal is grace and perfection

Whatever that may be for us

To try to attempt it

The perfect throw and the perfect

Catch but failing and failing that

Fall back on being merely good

Not nursing our discouragement

And envy with some lame excuse

Pretending not to want to be perfect

Pretending it wasn't really grace

Our whole purpose and plan

In coming to this earth

And not to settle for less

By November Valentine

First my keys go missing

Then my wallet then my phone

Without my crude identities

I enter the unknown

This happens every fall

To my deciduous soul

I let go of it all

Hopes and dreams

Needing and wanting

Becoming and being

I feel my I dissolve

In the bliss of nothingness

Blue snow on an open field

Let me be this

Words Are Not Material Things Valentine

You know how the same word

Has as many sounds as there

Are languages doesn't that mean

We still haven't quite captured 

What it's trying to say

Like when you listen

To a foreign language

Grasping a few words here and there

Or notice how it all sounds like

Some kind of strange singing

And speechless we fall back

On pantomime and pointing

Our poor words stranded there

Between music and meaning

Trying to make up their minds

Passing Valentine

We bump into one another

And turning to apologize

See something remote we recognize

In one another's eyes

In another life did we clash

In battle who killed who

Or was this just a reminder

Of some future rendezvous

We introduce ourselves

But I'm no good with names

And you're no good with faces

You remind me of someone

I was about to get to know

I look like the brother you never had

We preserve our stranger's gaze

As we embrace and pass

Going On Valentine

Something I wish I'd said

Before I woke to find you dead

Something I wish I'd done

When it came into my head

To take you in my arms

But I was too tired and slept

Or had somewhere else to be

Returning to find you'd left

Unable to wait for me

Now we will have to meet

Across memory's abyss

And you will have to use my voice

To tell me in your own words

How life can go on for us

In this and other worlds

Someone's Valentine

Someone had to tell him he had died

When he woke up on the other side

Still sick and drunk someone had

To help him sober up for a long

Time he thought he was dreaming

Struggling to get back to his body

Already rotting where he left it

He thought this must be some hospital

For the insane where every morning

They showed him pictures of his life

Each one more astonishing than the last

Until every day lay spread before him

Until someone had to come to release him

And carry him into the fields of light

In Another Land Valentine

What sounds like a distant party horn

The cat snoring in the late afternoon

She wakes embarrassed revels ended

Looks around with famished eyes

To find me staring back amused

'What? What is it?' she tries

To speak the words but turns

Bored by my dumb replies

And burrows back resuming her dream

Hardly knowing this from another

Leaving me to wonder if she goes

To some land where all the animals

Gather after they ascend from the earth

To be consoled I hope having suffered

So much to prove their worth

Teach Me To Burn Valentine

Aloe Vera Palo Verde

Blue agave prickly pear 

In a forest of saguaro

All assume the form of flames

Imprints of an old volcano

Incited by a blazing sun

That sips the water from the rocks

And leaves me panting dumb

Fires within fires unless I find

I too am burning blooming

Casting off sparks that rise

Out of my desert mind

White as Cereus flowers

Beauty that strikes me blind

 

Death Dream #101

After the hard schools of innocence

And the planned collisions of experience

A period of slow enlightenment

Was supposed to settle in

If you hadn't lost your mind yet

If you managed to preserve

Enough love to live on longer

Then things would be revealed

You had no way of seeing earlier

A sense of overwhelming gratitude

For life itself and its permission

To die with a smile on your face

Having learned nothing and everything

About the mysteries of the heart

An die Musik Valentine

Words are like chords in music

Or like leaves on a windy tree

Every sentence is a song

Every branch some melody

When the sun taps his baton

Or the moon starts waving her arms

And the world falls dark and silent

And listening grows long

When the horns of autumn sound

Or the strings of spring creep out

Their leafy recurring theme

And the words give up their meanings

Fallen helpless to the ground

And the music of their silence

Enfolds us in its dream

Where all is light and song

New Light Valentine

I'm told that there are ancient

Teachers who live inside the moon

Who when it separated from the earth

Went with it taking all their magic

To form their own circle of light

A doorway for the in and out of souls

So we could keep hold of the sun

At night and know it was still there

The intelligence falling from it

The pure warmth of the stars

Intermingling with the moonlight

Which is why we call her mother

Isis Sophie Queen of the Night

And pray for her return

Past Time And Space Valentine

Hands on your hips

You stand in the darkening yard

Proud of your progress so far

Things still to be done

But even without a plan

It seems to be coming together

At least by the look on your face

As I watch you through the window

Just standing there and you turn

Our eyes meeting and you smile

My hands on my hips

Mirroring-mocking you

Turning away with a shy grin

Love finding us out

Death Dream #87 Valentine

I suppose nearing the end

I dream back on the beginning

Because I'd love to start again

This was just a first sketch

Begging for revision

Next draft I'll be more conscious

Of others' feelings and more

Honest about my own

Next time because of you

There will be more diving deeper

And more sitting in the woods

More speaking your language

Less hesitation less hurry

When we meet again

On All Saints Day Valentine

I would like to arrange a tour

Of the thirteen obelisks of Rome

To see what old Thutmose was up to

What was so important he had

To write it on the finest granite

Monuments to the fathers

Who were gods and kings

Their fingers still pointing us upward

To a world we no longer see

On one there are doors carved

And windows as if someone

Lived there and on others a wish

That he would come again

And the gods speak to men

All Hallow's Eve Valentine

On the night of the not-dead souls

We dress the children up as ghouls

Or disgraced presidents or ballerinas

All manner of sheets and swords

And send them out on a candy bender

To defeat the monster death

You have to look like one

To pretend you're not afraid

You have to go from house to house

Scaring the bejesus out of the neighbors

Laughing in the face of their fear

Or bejeweled and swathed in silk

Pretend to be a princess angel

Freshly risen from the grave

Has This Ever Happened To You Valentine

At twilight out walking the dog

The streets empty and quiet

Lights on in some of the houses

The others dark and dreaming

She said she was overwhelmed

By a state of deepest silence

A soundless rapture

Of pure smiling peace

That stopped and seemed to lift

Her out of herself

A stillness she didn't want to leave

And when she tried to describe this

To her husband he looked at her

Like she was a child

Or was maybe finally going mad

Death Dream #79

I wandered through an empty school

And came into a great hall

Clouds melting on the walls

I went backstage and stood

In the doorways where the actors

Make their entrances and exits

Ghost children there were singing

And past the darkened dressing-rooms

To a door that locked behind me

To find myself in a dessicated

Garden and a grove of apple trees

Ripples of laughter in the leaves

I was alone as I had ever been

And could feel the earth invite me in

Daily Valentine

Yes I'm eighty but you don't

Have to push me around

Let me borrow some of your busy

I love the sound of your voice

Railing at me about all the things

That have to get done in the yard

And don't forget to put air in your tires

Last night the temperature dropped

But did you come to put a blanket

Over me or tell me the story

Of your daily disappointments

How the world is still so ignorant

And cruel let me wrap you

Safely in my dreams for you

Dear God Valentine

Not a God we have to invent

But ourselves with him here

Or without him there

She they it together

We come in with so much adoration

Starving for something to worship

Someone to hold dear

That feeling alone could be a God

Who has nothing to do with temples

Of death but an impulse

To invent a body over and over

A force that tunnels through it

And just goes on and on

Holding everything dear

Stray Valentine

Some cat sits at my feet

Adoring-suffering in its eyes

We cannot commit

Fully to one another

We keep to our ways

But she insists

On sleeping on my chair

So I'll feel guilty cruel

Chasing her off it when

She's keeping it warm for me

Our differences run deep she glares

It all comes back to the eyes

You know so little about love

But I can teach you stranger

With so much left to learn

Chosen Valentine

From the windy grave of Moses

Which God himself dug

So there must be such a place

You can still catch a glimpse

Of the Promised Land just there

Past the Plains of Moab

Past the festivals and the laws

To be carefully observed

That it go well with you

Like a father to his child

I bring stones to his tomb

Who knew I would doubt

And disappoint him the only way

I knew to become myself

Anticipatory Valentine

Moon on the sea

Sun on the earth

Sometimes they hold hands

Moon on the earth

Sun on the sea

Wait for it

The moment always coming

The moment always gone

And wedged between them

Your life so small

It hardly seems to matter

The way the moon does on the water

Or the sun does on the wall

Wait for it

Even you they call

Rapacious Valentine

We argued in the kitchen

Which was hungrier

The body or the soul

Whether there were two kinds

Of thirst or just one source

That the body could thrive

And thicken while the soul

Grew paler and thinner

Or the other way around

He was the cook for the children

And we stood in the forgotten

Emaciated garden of October

Make me kind chef the recipe

For my rapacious soul

Lest in terror it consume the world

Carried Valentine

A presence I was only aware of

When I felt pleasure or pain

And I admit humiliated

By your limitations your ugliness

My proud soul could not accept you

Always flaunting your innocence 

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry

How could wisdom have made you

And then placed you in my care

When I was a thief and a liar

Forcing you to carry me on your back

Lest my feet get caught

By this river rushing away

O plant me on the other side

You I learned to love too late

Arduous And Luminous Morning

Arduous and luminous morning

When the new moon we never see

Slipped from its lair to stand

Directly in front of the sun

A full black disk haloed

With radiant fire as if

The darkness of the past

Was trying yet again to overwhelm

All the future's light

And though the finches keep on singing

Through the minutes of muted light

We couldn't help but feel

This was the sign and seal

Of some momentous new beginning

In the biography of the light

What Is Human Work Valentine

The first organizing principle of the world

As every morning proves

Is the warmth of the sun

Out of its willingness to return

To the darkness it leaves behind

Our only source of the future

A little flame that bursts

Out of the ashes of every human heart

At least that's how I picture it

Each a sun with its own horizon

Hurriedly rising dressing for work

In freezing cold and humid heat

That something anything get done

Hating or loving our little lives

But is this really what the sun

Has in mind for us today

That so much light produce

So little good and our suns

Not shine the way they could

The Pleasure of Life Valentine

Some accept pain

As pleasure's payment

Of its debt but life's

No bargain and the cost

Of love accumulates over time

Keep your receipt he said

They'll want to scan it

When it's time to board

Marked with the date time and place

Each item clearly described

With its price in the right column

And the total at the bottom

Gratuity included not to worry

You'll never live long enough to pay it

No Excuses Valentine

Being afraid to love

Took up a lot of the time

I've lived I see that now

The fear meant love

Had already damaged me

That at one time or times

In the distant past

I had learned the need

To protect myself from it

Enough was enough

Though it made no sense

But somehow despite time

I've kept that memory alive

Of having once loved without fear

So I know I know how to do it

And have run out of excuses

Beholden Valentine

Human body earthly flesh

You live in the stirring

Of light and warmth

A little chaos of water

Turned blood a fish

Of the air with limbs

In no case does some love

Not stand behind you

A heart not beat for you

Breathing you in and out

Leaving you free to struggle

The poorest and the richest thing

On earth the only creature

Designed entirely by hope

Gone Before Valentine

For several years now

In the spring and in the fall

A single Flicker bird

For a day or two stops by

My yard here in the desert

On it way north or south

This must happen in other yards

But it seems unlikely after

So much time it could be the same bird

Who visits so consistently

Shrieking me to attention

Time to move on he calls

Time to find our real home

But he's gone before I can follow

Then Valentine

When he told us we couldn't take

Our heads to heaven with us

But only our naked hearts and deeds

That even our brilliant ideas luggage

We would have to leave behind

I suddenly felt foolish and afraid

Lifting my heart from my chest

Throwing the dice of my deeds on the table

It was then he said you would come

Plunging my hand in your side

So I knew I was truly dead

And though still no angel

Could sit with you and eat

All your food of love I was able

Mary's Valentine

In the stars begin divinity

A placement and a movement

As sure as nerves or sense

A meeting in and out of consciousness

Like pilgrims on a journey

Crowds and crowds of stars

Rushing past and suddenly emerging

One you can really talk to

One you have met before

At a wedding or in a dream

An open earnest joyful face

Once felt you can't forget

Who has been to Venus and back

And comes to you like morning

Eager to join you on your journey

Keep Going There Valentine

It's still astonishing to me

Our clever scientists don't see

The obvious morality

In every cell and star

Not just the stark intelligence

In the structure and design

Nor even the artistry that first

Led them to a shell or stone

But the essential goodness

In every natural thing

Revealing its true origin

In a superior world

I'm astonished by their fear

I know I share to ask

When we come to the dark abyss

What's there responsible for it all

Dismantled Valentine

In the manual for the dismantling

Of the delicate body from the soul

If you can't bear to read the text

Skip to the illustrations in chapter 3

Where a blameless gown is sketched

Unbuttoning a shattered bride

Next to the diagram of a second option

A bandage ripped off all at once

No time for the hurt to happen

Unmasking the wounded soul

As the real source of hunger and thirst

Look to the final pages if you haven't had enough

They're all in musical notation

And the beautiful body is humming along

Where Are You Tonight Valentine

The soul of the world is reaching

Despite the body's ancient lore

Just eighteen years old

Remember those days

When you were still cutting yourself

Sex and shame and alcohol

And yet bursting with potential

What did it mean to have a soul

Let alone entertain its secret source

The sense that something wants to destroy you

And you'll have to fight for your life

Because it could be you yourself

Having lost it poor soul

Who has come to save the world

Of All Valentine

Of all I was capable of doing

And all I would never master

Drawing music loving diving

Cooking praying kissing climbing

Overcoming my fear of flying

All I wanted to be for you

Which turned into a disaster

A phoenix rising from desire

Who knew only friendship cures

The disease of being only me

All I would never accomplish or achieve

Persisting in my narrow ways

To you the only one I leave

I feel certain will forgive

I Take The Cup Valentine

Our own hands were the first cup

Scooping the cooling water to our lips

Until our leaky fingers were struck

With the idea of a solid bowl

From which so many goblets

Trophies vessels have evolved
Even a chalice and a grail to hold

The mystery of the wine turned blood

And still I plead to take this cup

From me this sorrow and this pain

But who to give it to

The world refuses to take it up

I am myself the cup I drink

Which only your fine will can fill

While I Was Gone Valentine

You just couldn't help yourself

From harrowing the tired yard

Summer's dead removed

Leaving empty graves

Planted now with new

Flowering arrivals small

Hopes desperate to fill in

The few feet between them

The hard work of it

Humbling you proud

And our blue-flowering tree alone

Christ in its leafy branches

Heavier than you expected

Must have taken you days

Untangling his body from the dead

A Radical Departure Valentine

Sometimes these days I'm stopped

In my tracks just standing there

Immovable for a few moments

A stone in a stream letting it all

Wash over and around me

Life and time and my death go by

And it changes nothing this sunny day

It's as if I can feel myself

Melting and merging into things

A train or a bridge or an empty street

Like that one in Samos we walked all night

Because in a flash it all slips past

Veers off into some eternity

While death swims just upstream

Waiting at some harbor with you

Hepatica Valentine

To go from mineral to living color

From pebble to leafy petal flesh

Is it not an epoch's journey

To just show up one day

The rush of wind embracing

The miracle of your face

Waiting for your name to arrive

In no one's forest garden

After so much melting and groaning

Passing in and out of terrible fires

And silent centuries of ice

To bloom for a couple of hours

A mountain dissolved in your scent

Your secret promise kept

In The Time Of Elm Trees Valentine

Seventeen is the cruelest year

A rubber band pulled taut

Full of what you don't have

And empty of all you want

That summer I caught an endless bus

To a tiny North Ontario town

Where my ancient grandparents

Gave me a room in their crumbling house

And left me free to roam around

The fields and the next-door graveyard

Where their son the priest was laid

Grandma spoke hardly a word but

Grandpa played his fiddle for me

Ardent tunes from his Irish youth

And asked me what I wanted to be

I lied to them and said a priest

When a poet was the truth

I Don't Know Its Name Valentine

All summer long despite

The constant riveting heat

Purple flowers no one planted

Have spread in my narrow yard

It was the wind or the resident birds

Or seeds carried on my shoes

Tall large clumps the pools

Of sun have randomly fed

Kept constantly in flower

A pale alchemical purple

Waving above a sea of green

All if you look closely in

With a gleaming yellow center

That illuminates their sorrow

Earth's Valentine

The most curious thing about

Living on the earth today

Hobbled as we are by bodily misgivings

Besides the question of what it's worth

Is the unavoidable sense we're ever

Only aware of hardly half of what's

Right there in front of us

Stunned by the beauty of nature

We take the signifier for the sign

And get caught up in personal adventures

And the false science of history

How long will it be lost to us

The earth behind the earth

If we look further in

Where only spirit is

San Miguel Valentine

The San Miguel is a river in hell

That runs through deserted towns

Once flourishing with busy sounds

It starts with the naked bones of a saint

Exposed at the bottom of a pit

Who left behind forgotten now

A clear map to heaven

But once every ninth or eleventh year

He brings a heavy week-long rain

That turns the desiccated canyons

A startling resurrection green

A stolen paradise that lasts a season

When the dead return to the towns

To sing and dance in the ruined cathedrals

And tear all sadness down

From A Tower Valentine

It's clear when I look up

At the stars' blazing clusters

Of light like cities seen

From a plane at night

There must be other civilizations

Living there beings of light

At their most basic and profound

And it's clear the earth is just

One member of a scattered family

Even if the youngest one

Thrown out when her mother died

Putting everything in storage

And it's clear there's much

More darkness than light

But not clear which is winning

Cold Valentine

I left you stranded

On a distant star

With visitation rights

Just so I could drive this car

Speeding through winter nights

All the windows open

I left you for another

I would soon abandon

I left you pounding on the door

While I pretended to disappear 

Was it out of love or fear

I left you your favorite guitar

And a scribbled note

Please take the garbage out

Just Asking Valentine

What if suddenly this reliable earth

Evaporates under your feet 

And all the lights go out at once 

With only a lukewarm breeze 

Wafting from Saturn's shores

Breathing you slowly in and out

Will you have saved forgiveness enough

To spark a signal fire out of the nothing

Your are on that dark and shoreless sea

From what's left of your ashen heart

Will you have finally made a friend

Of that shining brother who stands

At heaven's only door or will

He send you back for more

One Valentine

Through whatever adumbrations

The world has led to you and me

So we can trace our bodies back

While our souls evade heredity

Some great grandmother's pale eyes

Recycled in a runaway boy

Who reenacts the promise

She was forced to destroy

Our souls that pull us forward

While our bodies trail behind

But this particular you

And this particular me

Our lives so intertwined

Divide equally between us

One destiny and mind

Unsolved Valentine

A body burnt beyond

Recognition in broad

Daylight and no one noticed

A human skull in a box

Of toys donated to Goodwill

Poisonous mushrooms popping up

Between the bright lantana flowers

Something rapping on my window

At two in the morning no one there

What am I to do with these

Edgar Allan mysteries

But turn the page read on

The clueless bodies pile up

The killer strikes at dawn

Late For Life Valentine

Her due-date's running late

Under the great dome of her belly

Her son's still staring at the ceiling

Where the frescoes of his life to come

Are just receiving the final touches

And the scaffolds are being taken down

Until finally his anxious guide and him

Are left alone in the vastness

Of the light of a single flame

His guide urging him to come

Look they're locking up the doors

But he's still taking pictures

With his phone to show

Them all when he gets home

Wilderness Valentine

How to get the story straight

In the land of if and but

Where there is nothing definite

But even more convincing doubt

How dam up the tide of hate

Would it only gouge a lake

To cover up our big mistake

What happened here

In that first year

How is it now

Only a few can hear

And yet the call stays clear

Only answerable

By love or fear

Because Valentine

Because I can hear them

They must be singing for me

A small nestle of finches

In the shedding tree

And that it matters not

To them I listen

Strangely caught

It matters all 

The more to me

Their song goes on forever

For pure pleasure

Until I start to hear

Buried inside

Some dark urgency

Some flight by night

That speaks to me

Recovering Valentine

A patch of skin flayed from the head

A transplant from the hips to fill it in

I hope you were under for all of it

And wake now with some effective meds

In your own comfortable bed

I'm sending my angel to sit with you

Until I can come myself

And a playlist of healing sounds

Some popular some Bach

Do you know Ravel's piano concerto

Second movement where the soul

Lifts out of the body and cascades

In a silver rain of stars as if

Music might make us whole

The Gift Of Extra Years Valentine

I rub my arm across my brow

I stare at purple flowers

I cut my hair shower and shave

And read content for hours

I wait for the ring-necked dove

To land on my neighbor's roof

Her coo is a kind of reprimand

Though she keeps it sweet and brief

I live in a luxury of time

Remembering all my debts

To friends pleading for forgiveness

And burying my regrets

If once you've really loved I find

There's no such thing as loneliness

Sweeping Up After Valentine

Last night the other shoe dropped

Heavy trees uprooted by high winds

An ochre dust covering the city lights

And then it rained for the first time

After several months of searing heat

And just yesterday I was reading all

About Proserpine the Goddess Natura

And the fairy-tale of her flight

Her slow fading from medieval minds

The forgetting of her holy rites

And now where she stood and spoke

A smiling weatherman predicts

Another rain will pass us by

Though the sky stay gray and thick

Where Am I Valentine

It's where my life domestic-comic

Intersects the incoming cosmic

On that bridge between the two

River rushing underfoot

Fires burning overhead

Where one can have a second thought

Not I but one with all the dead

The world lets us in too far

Yet everything depends on supper

First and last the river hums

That wants to carry me away

I stand admonished and amazed

In the kitchen of my days

Cutting carrots singing praise

What Does It Want Valentine

When I see the eye of the moon

Has opened up completely

And leans a little further in

As if for a better view of us

Blinking through shores of clouds

To mitigate its blinding gaze

I start to sense a great being

Whose blazing eye this must be

Some dreamer fully wakened

Looking around an unfamiliar room

Searching for its other eye perhaps

As if it left it here in the world

Pouring through every wave and town

Stopping every woman and man

God The Cat Valentine

Isn't God as tender as this cat

Who lays her cheek against my leg

And sleeps and snores like him

But still won't let me touch her

I know he can take on many forms

More ambitious than a cat

But something about her purring

Keeps him coming back

To stretch his legs

To leap and pounce

And after a long and

Unsuccessful hunt in the yard

Come home and rub his head

Against my foot circling me

Begging for his food

Paul's Birthday Valentine

Because we shared coming into this world

Into our strange and confusing holy family

Because you were the first infant I held

In my arms and I was only seven

I think I felt then so many

Years later looking back

A strange mixture of pride and envy

From the beginning and when

We grew up and went our ways

Meeting again only in the middle

Of our lives my talk turned into rancor

And after that we hardly spoke

For thirty years I think I felt

You were living the life

I had imagined for myself back then

And I resented you for it somehow

The life I had rejected for myself

And you into the bargain

But that was all a big mistake

Simple kindness tells me that

And your extended hand

What Enlightened Him Valentine

Because he foresaw

We'll all end up

As buddhas whatever

Time it would take

He treated everyone

He met with deep

Respect and tact

Bowing inwardly

As if to say don't forget

Where you're going

I hold you in the highest

Esteem your victory

Already won and look

You can almost taste it

Buddha Onboard Valentine

What if all babies are buddhas

Like the one following my gaze

Asking who are you as I pass by

And why are you smiling at me

A look of wonder about to cry

Or maybe a grin of recognition

Floats up from another world

The crease of a smile in time

To catch its blessing on the run

And carry home that image

Seeing everything for the first time

Face before it becomes a face

Yes why are you smiling

Try to be more like me

Crying and crying for this world

Unsure Valentine

When they finally dropped me off

On earth it was in the middle

Of a quarrel my unwed mother

Had to kiss my father off to war

Inside her we took the train

From nowhere north to the busy city

Where we were quite alone

In the hospital for wayward girls

Far from her embarrassed sisters

So I took my time arriving

While she wrote unsent letters

To him and the war got worse

She was only twenty and I

Unsure I was a blessing or a curse

Still Valentine

When I read

How he was betrayed

By the bad

Behavior of his friends

I knew it was me

When I noticed

Only one or two

Followed him

To the other side

Of his death I knew

It wasn't me

But still I feel

His shoulders under me

And know he carries me

To someone I must be

Days Like These Valentine

When we're apart

I start to believe

In a spirit world

A few hundred miles from here

Where you are living now

It's strange how souls

If we subtract the body

By distance or by death

Grow closer imagining one

Living inside another

Listen I wanted to tell you

Something important but it

Can wait and anyway it's

Late at night where you are now

In the memory of my dreams

Death Valley Days Valentine

Midsummer respite

In the seething desert

A human eighty degrees

A few days grateful cloudiness

Leftover hurricane's

Furtive rain from the coast

A breeze of drowsiness

In which everything is waking

And starting to breathe again

Intermission in summer's

Grand opera to carry us

Right out of time and space

Which will soon resume

Smiling parenthesis in which we feel

We might really belong on this earth

Prompted Valentine

If all that happens here

The gods have first lived through

And earthly time and space

Are one long deja-vu

If every life resolves to solve

Some grievance of the dead

And inch by inch we turn

To find it waiting up ahead

If rhythmically we stall

And start again like planets

Looking back on other worlds

In the middle of a vowel

Suspended waiting for our cue

Mustn't it all depend on you